bhOndOO takes his father for lunch.

After completion of the perspectives seminars, bhOndOO had been to Nagpur last week. One day, he went out with his father for some banking work which got delayed (as usual). They decided to eat outside. While in Bangalore, bhOndOO never places an order when with friends, for multiple reasons:

  • his voice never reaches the waiter.
  • when he looks at the menu card, he goes into the mode of reading a research paper and requires hours to finish it.
  • his mind runs an algorithm to find an optimal matching over his preference list of food items and the prices, which unfortunately is NP-hard.
  • his friends are very quick to decide the menu — some of them do not even need a menu card.

But, in Nagpur, being with his father who had rarely gone to hotels, bhOndOO thought of impressing him. His father asked him, “Shall we order two thalis?”. bhOndOO proudly, “No, no. I will place some good order.”.

bhOndOO grabbed the menu card from the waiter. It had 8 pages. Oops! It is almost a research paper. bhOndOO concentrated only on the column titled Vegetables. He looked at the prices: Wow! Very much affordable. The adjective affordable was not for the prices per se, it was more for not having to run the optimal matching algorithm!

The waiter came and promptly waited for the order. “Can you come after two minutes?”, bhOndOO was annoyed — not by the waiter, but by knowing that he had not yet decided the menu. His father kept looking at him and the menu card.

“Waiter?”, bhOndOO called for after five minutes. The waiter approached and started noting down the order. “Two by one Tomato Soup. One Veg Springroll in starters. In main course, one Malai Kofta, one Veg Kolhapuri, four Naan, one Pineapple Raita, and in dessert, two mango icecream.” and bhOndOO breathed heavily, as if he had just returned from Machine Learning viva.

The waiter gave a look that bhOndOO did not understand. But bhOndOO knew that his father would feel very proud to listen to his son’s ability! His father leaned over the table and asked, “You ordered for only two of us, right?”. “Don’t worry, Dad.”, bhOndOO was confident.

“Sir…”, the waiter interrupted, “We do not have mango icecream.”. bhOndOO looked at him and remembered his ME thesis defence in which Prof Vishwanath had remarked on his algorithm, “Your idea is flop. It does not work on Petersen Graph.”. bhOndOO came back to the present and hated the idea of looking back at the menu for another research! “Cancel the icecream.”, bhOndOO managed. Then he looked at his father’s inquisitive eyes, made a face and uttered, “The other flavors are not that good.”.

The waiter took back the research paper and went away. bhOndOO started telling about hotels in Bangalore and how posh and stylish those are. Then he started telling about Hotel Management and related courses. His father was listening to him with a lot of pride and satisfaction. The proud listening was interrupted by The Waiter’s Return. “Sir, your order will require half-an-hour.”.

bhOndOO was annoyed. But he did not wish to waste his efforts. “Okay, make it fast.”, he ordered. Then he looked at his father’s worried face and answered, “We will have proper hunger till the food arrives.”.

For next five minutes, bhOndOO did not talk. Everyone around was happily eating. The food-smell was increasing bhOndOO’s hunger. But he showed nothing on his face.

After another five minutes, the person at the counter, who looked like the owner, came to bhOndOO and explained, “Sir, the person who prepares various dishes is on leave today. Can you order something else?”.

bhOndOO looked at him. He found the owner’s left cheek very welcoming for his hands. He controlled himself and looked at his father. His father gathered the situation and ordered, “Two thalis.”. Then he looked at bhOndOO, as if saying, “This is not Bangalore, my dear.”.

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7 Responses to “bhOndOO takes his father for lunch.”

  1. sachin (bloggeratti incredibilis) Says:

    hehe…very true
    happens all the time
    i cant even decide b/w tea or coffee at a kiosk
    i say tea at the counter go ahead and watch what everyones ordering and try to show off by ordering the opposite…

  2. aravindh Says:

    really fundoo…

    this bhundoo character is damn interesting

  3. iisc Says:

    Thanks Aravindh.

  4. dinner at nesara. « iisc life. Says:

    […] iisc life. Life of a student researcher — bhOndOO. « bhOndOO takes his father for lunch. […]

  5. Himank Says:

    😀 Sahi hai beedu.. quite a nice blog.. i started with your latest post and came here reading each and everyone.. nice writings man…

  6. iisc Says:

    Thanks a lot, Himank and Welcome onboard!

  7. Aditya Says:

    Good stuff man……

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