bhOndOO goes to dj.

Thanks to Hariprasad for the idea of this story.

“What is the plan for Engineers’ Day?”.
“Let’s go out for a trek?”.
“How about a movie? The Last Lear?”.
“Shall we go to M G Road? We will roam around.”.

bhOndOO was listening. He suddenly attacked, “Engineers’ Day is not a holiday!”. Everyone got silent and started staring at bhOndOO, who continued, “We celebrate it in the memory of the great engineer Sir Visvesvaraya. He did so many wonderful engineering marvels in the country and you people are talking about going for a trek, movie and roaming around on his birthday!”.

For the first time, junta felt ashamed while bhOndOO was talking. Noting the silence, bhOndOO entered the political speech mode.

“We should do something which will show our abilities as engineers. We should do something that will make us proud of being engineers. We should do something that will help the common man.”.

He stopped and expected an applause. Nobody did. Without saying much, everyone went back to their rooms. bhOndOO was left alone in his hostel room. He was feeling bad — not to see the mentality of today’s engineers, but because nobody clapped at his inspiring speech. To feel a change, he started reading a paper on Pointer Analysis and soon slept on his chair.

His sleep was disturbed by a rush outside. He opened the door and peeped outside. It was getting dark. There was a strange smell of deodorants lurking around the corridor. He noticed a few strangers roaming around. They were looking like taporis, with very bright clothes, and weird hair-styles. When bhOndOO blinked his sleepy eyes a few times, he realized that they were his friends with whom he was chatting earlier.

“Where are you all going?”.
“We are going to a DJ.”.

bhOndOO realized that engineers would remain engineers. He sighed, “You are doing injustice to your engineering degree. What will the soul of Sir Visvesvaraya feel! You people are incorrigible. Shall I join?”.

They grabbed their and others’ bikes and went to a DJ near M G Road. The security guard at the entrance allowed everyone except bhOndOO to enter. When questioned, the security guard reasoned, “He is not attired properly!”.

On hearing the security guard, Gullu and BenJi looked at each other, then at bhOndOO, and came near him. Before bhOndOO realized, the buttons of his shirts were opened, his sleeves were folded till his deep-hidden biceps, and his well-comb hair were scattered. The hair started looking like standing grass, and bhOndOO started looking like an electric-shocked mawali. The guard got out of his way.

The place was dark, lit intermittently with red and blue flash lights, the sound of the speakers was so huge that girls had to shout to whisper. This was the first time bhOndOO had come to a DJ. He had long forgotten about Sir Visvesvaraya. With wide open eyes and mouth, he was looking at the people in general and ladies in particular. Everyone of his colleagues left him and went on the dance floor. He was amazed to see non-familiar guys-n-gals dancing together. In that club, standing at a corner, bhOndOO conjectured that a DJ might become the reason of India’s unity!

bhOndOO was representing diversity in the unity. He wanted to dance, but his dance was of the level of Govinda aala re, aala in Janmashtami. But he noticed that his colleagues were not really dancing like Hrithik Roshan. They were simply better versions of Dharmendra. That boosted him up. He now started looking for an opportunity to rock on the dance-floor. I will join them with the next song, bhOndOO made up his mind.

The song ended and his friends came back, tired. They all were sweating and bhOndOO understood why the hostel corridor was smelling so much of deodorants. The perspiring laughs made bhOndOO feel further to dance. The enthusiastic friends started, Sabse aage ladke kaun — IISc, IISc.

Soon, the new song was started. His friends started pushing bhOndOO to go. But bhOndOO was feeling very shy. “No, no.”, he tried. Although Gullu and BenJi both were pushing him, bhOndOO’s mass was much more and he managed not to get pushed. They accepted their defeat and stopped pushing.

“But why don’t you want to go?”.
“I don’t have a partner…”, words came out.

His friends looked at one another and started laughing very loudly. bhOndOO felt embarrassed to have spoken the truth. He started looking down. But Gulu was not ready to let this opportunity go. He came closer to bhOndOO, whirled his left hand around bhOndOO’s neck from the back, kept it on his left shoulder, and pointing his right hand towards another corner, put forth a deal, “You see the girl in pink standing there. Just go and ask her to dance.”.

“No, no! I won’t go.”.
“You have to go, bhOndOO.”, Chunna declared.
“You must go!”, Rambo.
“When will you learn to dance then!”, Gullu.
“Come on, bhOndOO! Be a man!”, BenJi.

BenJi managed to wake up bhOndOO’s male-ego with Be a man! bhOndOO took a deep breathe, felt confident, and started walking towards the girl in pink. In the sounds of the song, he did not hear his friends laughing and saying, “Pitega bhOndOO.”.

The girl noticed a shabby dangerous-looking creature coming her way. She looked around helplessly for her friends who were on the dance floor. She looked back at the creature and dreaded. She tried to step back, but was stopped by the pillar behind. The creature, with a wicked smile, came closer and stopped.

There was a silence of two seconds, which made the girl nervous. bhOndOO finally managed and said something. The girl could not hear anything. But since she wanted to avoid the creature come closer and shout in her ears, she lip-read him, “Will you dance with me?”.

“No.”, came a direct reply which was easy for bhOndOO to lip-read. He was disappointed, turned around, and came back to his friends.

“What happened?”.
“She denied.”.
“Nevermind, bhOndOO. Try that girl in yellow.”.
“No, I don’t want to dance now.”, sad bhOndOO declared, without looking at the girl in yellow.

He spent the remaining time looking down. At few occasions, when he looked up, he noticed the girl (in pink) angrily looking at him. They all left the DJ after some time. The Engineers’ Day was celebrated.

bhOndOO forgot the incident soon — bhOndOO is good at that. After a few days, he went to meet his advisor, Prof Krishnamurthy, to show results of his experiments.

“May I…”.
“Oh! Come in, bhOndOO.”.
bhOndOO came in.
“Have a seat, bhOndOO. Munni, this is my student, bhOndOO. He is working on Pointer Analysis. Since you wish to work on Dataflow Analysis, you should talk to him sometime. And bhOndOO, this is Munni, my niece. She is joining for MSc.”.

bhOndOO and Munni looked at each other and none of them said Hello.

“Yes, Munni. You were telling about some loafer students from the institute?”, Prof Krishnamurthy continued.


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2 Responses to “bhOndOO goes to dj.”

  1. robin kurusinkal Says:


    btw whats a tapori?

  2. iisc Says:

    Thanks Robin. A tapori means vagabond. In fact there is a wiki entry for the word:

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